June 5, Four Birthdays Without My Father

5 Juni yang Tak Pernah Sama Lagi

(ulang tahun ke empat  kalinya tanpa Ayah)

Hari ini, langit tetap biru seperti biasa

Tapi jiwaku tak pernah lagi sama

Tanggal lima, bulan Juni

Adalah ulang tahun ku namun terasa sunyi

Keempat kalinya lilin tak dinyalakan

Bukan karena lupa, tapi karena kehilangan

Ayah, sejak Ayah pergi—tahun jadi sepi

Dan hari lahir, jadi hari paling sunyi

Tak ada peluk yang menenangkan resah

Tak ada ucapanmu yang sederhana, tapi penuh berkah

“Selamat ulang tahun,jun,”

Kini tinggal gema, tak pernah kembali nyata.

Aku mencoba tegar di balik senyuman

Tapi jujur, hati ini selalu kehilangan

Karena ulang tahun, kini hanya hitungan

Tanpa kue, tanpa pesta, tanpa harapan.

Namun Ayah, jika kau dengar dari tempat tinggi

Ketahuilah, aku rindu tak berbunyi

Dan meski tak lagi merayakan hari ini

Aku tetap anakmu—yang terus berdiri.



Translation: 

5 June Will Never Be the Same

(my fourth birthday without Dad)

Today, the sky is still blue as always,
but my soul has never been the same
The fifth day of June
my birthday—now feels unbearably quiet

For the fourth time, no candles are lit
not because we forgot
but because we lost
Since the day you left, Dad
the years have turned hollow
and my birthday has become the loneliest day of all

No warm embrace to ease my worries
no simple blessing from you
that used to mean everything
“Happy birthday, Jun,”
now echoes only in memory
never again in reality

I try to stay strong behind a smile
but truthfully, my heart still aches
Birthdays are now just dates on a calendar
no cake, no celebration, no spark of hope

But Dad, if you can hear me
from the place where the sky is gentler
know that my silence is filled with longing
And even though I no longer celebrate this day
I will always remain your child
the one who continues to stand.